Do you believe in miracles? I do. Sometimes I look back and realize how much of a miracle every day is. My life isn’t perfect, but my days are happy and blessed. Last year, I went a year without health insurance. I was struggling all year to get on a plan and once I lost my job it made it even harder and I was in an endless loop of being tossed from one place to another without any final answers. Of course, my health issues still went on during that time and I stacked up quite a LOT of medical bills. I worked hard calling around, filling out paperwork, letting people know that I just couldn’t afford these things. And I was pleased that I got many of them taken care of, I felt accomplished even.
But somehow, they saved the really huge ones for this year. I got an emergency bill that was $994 dollars and absolutely freaked out. When I picked myself back up from the floor, I realized all I could do was pray about this one, and I did. And God provided for me miraculously and took care of it. I was a little shocked, even though I was the one who had asked him to provide. There was always the tiniest little bit of doubt.
Although I laugh at the Israelites in the Bible for constantly forgetting what God is capable of, how he saved them from Egypt, how he parted the red sea, how he constantly provided for them in the desert. They always doubted their survival, they just… forgot. And oftentimes I find that if I’m not in a constant state of gratefulness, that I tend to forget how much God has already done for me in my life. Realizing that in the moment, I felt ashamed to have doubted him.
Then, bam, the biggest bill I had ever received came and knocked me out again. $35,964.93. I just… I can’t. I was horrified, and quickly all of the miracles that had happened flew from my mind. All I could see was the harsh reality in front of me, I forgot who I was, I forgot who God is. All I knew was that I was in deep trouble and I started flailing around, I had to get a job. Never mind that it would probably land me in the hospital again, I had to handle this.
And it was then I heard the still small voice that I often ignore or yell over in my hurry.
It was so quiet that I almost thought I hadn’t heard it, that I could almost ignore it. But I couldn’t ignore the peace that settled into my soul.
6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. – Philippians 4:6 NIV
Honestly, I used to be anxious about everything. I always viewed prayer as the last resort when other things didn’t work out. I carefully delegated small tasks to God, things that I knew would work out okay, because then, there was nothing to lose if it didn’t right? Or if he said to wait, or if he said no. Or maybe if I just wasn’t worthy enough, but I am his child.
One of the great books I picked up from Re:Write is called The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson, in his book he talks about prayer in a way that I’ve never prayed before. Focused, intensive, faith filled prayers. I started up a prayer board, I took one of my craft boards and started asking people what they needed me to pray for, already many of those prayers have been answered in miraculous ways. So I thought to myself, why am I holding back? What is so scary about the impossible prayers?
Since these things are written down, I worry about looking like a fool praying for the biggest most impossible things. (Although that’s never stopped me from singing and dancing through grocery stores). I worry that it is too demanding of God, although God himself is so infinite that $35,964 dollars is nothing to him. And so, I buckle down and I pray. I’m going to add any and all bills to the back of my prayer board and circle them in prayer as well.
Every morning, as part of a group challenge from church, I’ve been spending quiet time with God, before I even get out of bed. I thank him for all that he’s done so far and I pray for anyone who he brings up while I’m in that moment. It has literally changed my life. The more time I spend praying and reading my word, the more that I realize, he is an impossible God. He serves out miracles left and right, all we have to do is have faith and ask. To step boldly up to the throne of grace. There is nothing you can ask of God that is too much, if he answers in a way you don’t think or even says no, it’s okay. He still heard you and he has something even better in store for you. All we are called to do is trust and simply ask.
Let me know if any of you have “impossible” prayers! It doesn’t have to be money related, it could be health issues, relationships, a job, a challenge in your life, anything! And if you would like me to pray for you, just tell me in the comments and I would be more than happy to add you to my prayer board as well.